I’m trying really hard right now not be like this, but it is exhausting. I keep telling myself “Don’t be Kevin. Don’t be Kevin. Don’t be Kevin.” I want to sleep.
Kevin knew something was wrong. He was facing impending doom, total failure, a complete collapse of what should be, and he did not give one single fuck at all. He knew that the utter collapse of the status-quo would only result in a negative situation. It would be inevitable, prior experiences and evidence showed that only one outcome was possible if he stayed the course.
But Kevin did not care. His eyes were glazed as he looked around at is travelling companions. They were his friends and he had set out on this course with them. He would go down with them.
He thought to himself “I should stop. I should turn myself around, I should jump out of the way. I should take a single step in another direction to correct myself from the self-destructive course I have set.”
But instead Kevin let himself continue.
Kevin looked around him at the people who had been his travelling companions and saw them all abandon him and urging him to follow. He simply looked back at them with mild confusion, mild longing, and mild apprehension but mostly with apathy.
Then something happened, Kevin once again acknowledged the gravity of his situation and realized that with very little effort he could change his direction. He could save himself. All he needed was a catalyst, all he needed was a little push. All Kevin needed was a fuck to give.
Kevin’s eyes momentarily cleared and he searched frantically for a single extra fuck. Alas, his supply was occupied elsewhere; given to other people and left behind long ago.
Kevin let himself return to his previous state of apathetic calm. His course was set. His doom was before him. And Kevin did not care.
He failed the next day’s test.