Three weird things about me

1) I have always felt awkward saying ‘comfortable’ in conversation. The word just seems unnecessarily long for a simple idea. And saying ‘comfy’ just sounds excessively juvenile or otherwise inappropriate. When I’m sitting in a nice chair I am comfortable and when I’m snuggled under blankets I’m comfy. Using one for the other seems to me like trying to use water instead of milk when making hot chocolate – theoretically you could, but don’t. You’ll be happier for it.

Seeing either word written though is just fine. I don’t even say them in my head when I read them. I simply imagine what the words ‘comfy’ and ‘comfortable’ mean.

Additionally, I have no problems with the word comfort but working it into natural speech in place of ‘comfortable’ and ‘comfy’ is really awkward.

Maybe there should be a new way of describing the feeling one gets when snuggled under a fleece blanket – I propose we all begin saying ‘Comfous’. It kind of just rolls off the tongue well too.

Comfous

2) I pile shit on my bed all the time. Not literally because that would be gross, but usually there will be a pile of clothes or papers or something on there.

Most days I clean it up before going to sleep. Sometimes I’ll sleep on the couch instead. I might push it to one side and set up a barricade between me and my pile of crap and if I’m really desperate I just don’t go to sleep.

But every once in a while I will take my blankets and a pillow and set up a little bed for myself on the floor as if I was saying:

“No no no pile of crap. You’re my guest! You take the bed.”

JS33081066

Not mine but accurate

This might just be laziness on my part or it might come from practice sleeping on the floor at friends’ places after parties or a long night studying and simply having grown accustomed to a carpet mattress. At this point I really could not say.

3) My sense of direction is terrible. It took me years to learn my way around my own neighborhood  (the one I grew up in) and to this day it is still unwise asking me to guide you around it. On top of this I am from one of the largest cities in North America and when I talk about it and tell people which neighborhood I live in things get… awkward.

Usually I can get by with simply saying that it’s this borough or it’s this street and that street – most people drop the subject after that. Sometimes I have to explain which end of the city it’s in. But when I get really unlucky I need to explain to somebody how to get around in Toronto.

This is the stuff of my nightmares.

map_toronto

Before I know it I’m making guesses and contradicting myself and being corrected by the person I’m trying to direct around my hometown. It’s really embarrassing.

Toronto is great because the streets are more or less arranged in a square grid so giving north, south east and west directions is pretty simple. A big part of my inadequacy however comes from remembering names and where one street is in relation to another. The ttc helps in this regard because but the stations are named after the streets they are located on but only if you can remember where one station is in relation to the others – and now we are back to the same problem.

To get around my terrible sense of direction I always make sure I have a plan to get where I need to go before I leave. Usually when I’m guiding people I direct them to Google Maps. After a while I commit things to memory but it takes me forever to do so. As I said, I still haven’t memorized the layout of the neighborhood where I grew up.

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